Veronica VanessaToday my eyes were reopened. For the first time, I see clearly again what was the main reason that I am here, and not in Jakarta. It's not about my dreams of going overseas (as my definition of 'overseas' was at least as far as Australia), it was a need. My dreams were built upon this need, it was amended from something else entirely. Of course, there's the thing about having to get good education to make a living in the future. That, too, was amended from a need of something I had long forgotten.
Never again shall I forget the reason. I may change my mind, but my reason for being here never changed. It had taken place, it was in the past. It happened, and it was the reason why I am here.
To think about it again, he had nothing to do with it. Haha.
vNs, be a fighter. Be a fighter that you had always envisioned yourself to be. Don't give up, don't look back.
You've got someone now.
-vNs-
Relapse
Sunday, September 26, 2010 11:43 PM
Zzz
Friday, September 24, 2010 3:54 PM
Well, yesterday the cycle ends :P In the end Kai insisted on accompanying me to see the doctor, and so we went. I'm glad we went, cos today I feel much better after the medications ;) It makes me feel drowsy though -.-" If I'm not wrong all the medicine should be finished by Sunday night or so, so I won't have to fight sleepiness in school XD
Yeah, dizziness is gone! ((: So is the chills, left the sore throat (getting better) and tiredness -.-"
I kind of love the new internet connection :D it's faster, and so far I haven't been disconnected at all, not even once :D
Phew. Sometimes I'm still a bit puzzled on what I want to do in the future. I know what I like and dislike, but I don't really have a clear idea on how to make a living out of doing what I like. Well, so I like art and craft, I like to read and write, I like to edit graphics, which is why so far my top course choice is Communication and New Media. That's the only course that I think have connections to most of my likes :S I may not mind taking business or applied maths/statistics though :P Or Information Systems? I'm just not going to take engineering or sciences.
I wonder if I will make any last minute changes to the courses I apply to next year, the way I did when choosing my subject combination in JC. Mind you, if I had stuck to my plan, I would be taking Bio and Econs instead of Physics and History. To think about it again, if I'm given a second chance, I guess my subject combination will be H2 Maths+Chemistry+History and H1 Econs, or H2 Maths+History+Econs and H1 Chem/Phys. Haha. Of course now that I'm already so near to the end, I won't regret anything XD
Oh yea I just realised that all the courses that I want are from different faculties -_-"
Ah I keep stoning -.-Sleepy sleepy -.-
-vNs-
Short Blog Revival :P
Thursday, September 23, 2010 2:59 PM
Today, I:
1. Took my last prelim paper.
2. Renew my internet contract. (and upgrade the speed)
3. Had a nice solo lunch at The Soup Spoon.
4. Went to place a special order at Borders. (haha that almost rhymes. I shouldve made more than one order :P)
5. Went to get a backup battery for phone (i'm just so used to my old phone, in which you can play pool for hours and still have at least a half-full battery -.-)
6. Went for a haircut.....no. The hairdresser wasn't in today :( So I'm going back next week or so. Irritating fringe :/
If a younger me, say, four and a half years ago, was told that I'd be doing all that alone in a foreign country, I bet she will be excited, eyes brimming with a sense of adventure. Well..:/ Yea, here I am, living half the life I dreamed about. Half, cos, well, I _am_ in a foreign country, but it's not far enough like I imagined it to be XD
These years I'm torn between the dream I (used to?) have and other thoughts. If I go further from here, I may fulfil my needs for adventure, I will make new friends, experience new cultures, get immersed in another world entirely. Yet by doing so I may sever relationships I had fostered here. It'll be so damn difficult to see my family too. If I live far away, I may not know when will be the last time I see someone for I may not come back that often. On the other hand, I still find it difficult to accept that my future children will be victims of a more and more competitive lifestyle. I guess it is unavoidable, but if there is any way I can avoid it...
Of course, reality check. It is super expensive to go further from here, and with my AJ prelim results, I don't believe I can get any scholarships that get me anywhere -.-" So, forget it :/
Down with sore throat :( and flu-like aching body :( Wondering whether or not to go to school tomorrow. Apparently, this is always the cycle: started to get sick --> still go to school --> get worse --> go to see doctor and miss 1-2 day(s) of school --> get better after a long time -.- Why can't it be: started to get sick --> go to see doctor --> recover fast? :/
Let's hope I'll get well tomorrow? :/
-vNs-